Pinocchio Starring Terminator – Hero Swap

Pinocchio Starring Terminator – Hero Swap


Finally, he’s finished! My very own T800. But wouldn’t it be nice if he were a real boy? Oh, wishing star! I wish upon you for my
sweet T800 to be a real boy. That would be the most wonderful thing ever. Oh Geppetto, you’ve given so
much happiness to others you deserve to have your wish come true. Big puppet made of steel, wake! The gift
of life is yours to feel. I can move, talk, and walk. Am I a real boy? Not yet! Prove yourself brave, truthful,
and unselfish and someday you’ll be a real boy. This is Jiminy Cricket. He’ll be your conscience. Hello, Jiminy. Hello, T800. Let’s be real good from now on, ok? OK I will be real good. You can talk? Yes, I have a conscience now and someday I’ll be a real boy. I’ll be brave,
truthful, and unselfish. OH BOY!! Now be a good boy and go to school like the other children. Here take this apple with you. I do not need to process food. I’m
a cybernetic organism with only living tissue on my exterior. Ok then… well have a good day, son. What is that I hear? That boy is not a real boy? He will make me rich! Rich, I tell you! HAHAHA Excuse me, my dear boy. How would you like to be the main star of Stromboli’s puppet show? I need your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle. What? I see now why you think that I have strings. But strings are something that I cannot do. Because I do not have strings on me! (gunshot) (screaming) How dare you shooting at me! Just you wait! When I sell you, you won’t be laughing anymore. I am not programmed to laugh. You can’t just go around trying to kill people, ok? Why?
You just can’t! Trust me on this. Oh no, what have you gotten yourself into? Did you go to school as you were told? Affirmative. I know you’re lying, T800, because your nose is growing. They are not lies. They are true lies. Listen, I can shrink your nose and get you out of this cage if only you’ll speak the truth. I require no assistance. Daddy, daddy I’m home! Look over here. It’s a letter from Geppetto. It says, “Dear son, I got worried when you didn’t come home last night. I went out
to search for you but somehow got eaten by a giant whale. I’m now living inside
the whale. Hugs and kisses, Geppetto. OH NO! What should we do? It’s time to go whale hunting. Come with me if you want to live. (explosion) YAhooohoooey! Hasta la vista, whaley. You’ve been such a good and brave boy by saving your father. You deserve to be a real boy. Hooray, I’m a real boy. Have you seen this toy maker?

100 thoughts on “Pinocchio Starring Terminator – Hero Swap

  1. Hero swap… Hear me out… Jason Bourne and Simba
    Mufasa- "Jason…"
    Jason- "Father!"
    Mufasa- "remember who you are …"
    Jason- "father!"
    Mufasa-"remember…"
    (Fade out)

  2. “You can’t go around trying to kill people, okay!?”
    “ w h y “
    “Ya just can’t! Trust me on this.”

  3. "I see now why think that I have strings, but strings is something that I cannot do…. BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE STRINGS ON ME!" (Pulls out shotgun and fires into the crowd)

  4. I debate on which part is my favorite. It's either when he yells "THERE ARE NO STRINGS ON ME!" and shoots at the audience, says "They are not lies. They are *True Lies*, OR when he says "I REQUIRE NO ASSISTANCE!" and literally rips both his nose and half of his face off before busting out of the cage.
    I think it's gotta be where he rips off his own face. That… That was gold. XD

  5. OK, I will be real good

    I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle

    I am not programmed to laugh

    It’s time to go whale hunting

    Hasta La Vista, Whaley

    Hooray, I’m a real boy

    Lol!!!! These lines crack me up!!!

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